Married Since: 2010

Pets: No

Stay at Home Parent: No

Other Adopted Children at Home: Yes

Other Biological Children at Home: No

We are very excited for the opportunity to welcome a new baby into our family through adoption! We hope we are a match for you so that we can fulfill our dream of having the family we’ve prayed for, while at the same time, provide the life for your baby that you desire.

Lucas and Caly

from Illinois

Lucas

Ancestry: N/A

Religion: Catholic

Occupation: Human Resource Manager

Education: MBA

Hobbies: Sports, Hunting, Working out

Caly

Ancestry: N/A

Religion: Catholic

Occupation: Chief Financial Officer

Education: MBA

Hobbies: Cooking, Reading, Sports

Baby

Preferred Ethnicity of Baby: All Races / Ethnicities

Preferred Gender of Baby: Either

Religion Child To Be Raised: Catholic

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From Us to You

Dear Expectant Mother:

Thank you for giving us the opportunity to introduce ourselves. We are Lucas and Caly, a happily married couple since 2010 and parents to our four-year-old daughter, Sophia and our eighteen-month-old, Tucker. Our family was made possible because of two strong, selfless birth mothers like you. As we write our fourth dear expectant mother letter, we are reflecting upon our three prior journeys – the first was a failed adoption when the expectant mother decided not to place the child after delivery, the second brought us our sweet daughter, and the third brought us our wonderful son. Each experience has molded us into the parents we are today and has given us an appreciation for the sacrifice you are making for the love of your child.

Caly’s cancer treatment as a baby led to infertility, which originally started us down the adoption path. When we started our journey with adoption several years ago, we knew one thing – we wanted a baby to love, provide for and enrich their life just as much as they would change ours. We discussed very early on that we were open to a child of any race or ethnicity. We discussed that with our family and friends prior to starting the process and we were met with words of encouragement, promises of support for us and our future child, and acts of family and friends educating themselves on what the reality would be like helping to “be the village” for our baby that was already so loved. We still have that amazing village, but with recent events happening in the world, we have been doing a lot of self-reflecting and talking to those closest to us and our children.

Before our son was born, Sophia started asking questions about why she was brown, and Mommy and Daddy were white. We explained that not everyone looked alike and showed her that she had brown dolls, white dolls, brown Barbies, white Barbies, and showed her in storybooks how there were kids that were all different colors. We talked about differences people have outside of skin color too and that those differences should be celebrated because it is what makes the world so special. She continued to make comments from time to time, never upset, but just noticing a difference and we have always taken these opportunities to acknowledge how these differences are all unique and beautiful. She wanted Mommy to have hair like her, so Caly would style her hair and Sophia’s to match as closely as possible and Sophia’s face would light up. When we decided we were ready to adopt again, we knew we wanted an African American baby, not because we were against any other races or ethnicities, but because we wanted Sophia to have someone else that looked like her at home. We wanted home to be a place that she never felt alone or that she did not belong. The first time she met Tucker, her first words were “he matches me, Mommy – like you match Daddy.”

We both feel strongly about our children wanting to feel included and comfortable in their surroundings. While the experience is in no comparison to being raised by parents of a different race, Caly has experience of being raised in a non-traditional family setting. Caly’s parents divorced when she was very young and her mother remarried when she was four. Caly considers her step-father as her father and her half and step siblings as her brother and sisters. Her family never differentiated with the titles of “step” or “half” and everyone grew together as one tight-knit family. Outside of the home, Caly and her brothers were constantly questioned about how they were so close in age but not twins. When she would go to the doctor and ask about family medical history, it was a reminder that only some of the people she considered family were actually “part of her” and they would deal with stares or prying questions about “how are you really related” to certain people. As we said, we are not trying to compare or equalize the experiences, but we feel that these experiences have helped us identify some situations in which our children could encounter uncomfortable situations. Additionally, from these experiences, we believe that family is not determined by the blood running through your veins; rather, it is based upon those who love and care for you the most.

While we can’t begin to understand the difficult decision you are faced with, we want you to know that we would welcome your baby into our home with open and loving arms and challenge ourselves, our family, and friends to be the best village for your baby. We live in a smaller town with strong family values and a focus on faith and community. We will make sure that our children are raised with a strong spiritual influence, one that is demonstrated through our own lives.

We are very excited for the opportunity to welcome a new baby into our family through adoption! We hope we are a match for you so that we can fulfill our dream of having the family we’ve prayed for, while at the same time, provide the life for your baby that you desire.

With love,
Lucas & Caly

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About Caly, by Lucas

Caly is the absolute best thing that has ever happened to me. She is a loving and caring person who always goes above and beyond to put others first. Not only is she a stunningly beautiful person both inside and out, but she is an amazingly hard worker who accomplished more by age 30 than many people dream to accomplish in their entire professional careers. I absolutely love that she is so intelligent, but also loves to have fun and has no trouble laughing at herself from time to time. In addition to her many talents, she has also incorporated the fact that she is a great mother. I have so much fun with her, Sophie, and Tucker, and every day is a new adventure with the three of them. I thank God every day that He graced me with the great gifts I have in these three. Spending time with Caly is always fun and exciting – we are interested in similar things, which makes for memories we can keep for the rest of our lives. If ever I’ve had a bad day, or am generally in a bad mood, she has a knack for turning my day around with a simple touch or flashing her gorgeous smile (and it seems she has instilled this quality in our children as well). When life seems to drag me down, she is there to pick me up. Her loving touch and caring personality have translated seamlessly into motherhood, and I’m very excited by the idea of extending our family to include another addition.

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About Lucas, by Caly

Growing up, every girl dreams of her Prince Charming, but few are lucky enough to meet him.  I met mine during my freshman year of college, and although he didn’t ride in on a white horse, he swept me off my feet with his ability to make me laugh, his determination, and skills on the baseball field!  Lucas is the perfect balance to my personality and always helps me to find the good in every situation – which over the years I’ve had to rely on quite a bit.  He has such a loving heart and, in all honesty, has never met a person that he cannot get along with.  He has a genuine passion for life, a strong work ethic, the ability to instantly fill a room with laughter, and challenge me to always be the best person I can.  Lucas shares my love of baseball, outdoors, and being surrounded by friends and family, so we never have trouble finding things we enjoy doing together.  Watching Lucas become a father four years ago, made me fall even more in love with him.  It grows more and more each day as I watch him with Sophia and  Tucker.  Sophia has him wrapped around her finger and he wouldn’t want it any other way.  I already know Tucker is going to share his love of sports and he is usually not too far from his dad’s side.  I always knew that he would be an amazing father and he far exceeded my expectations.  Every day of our lives together is an adventure, but having him as my best friend, partner and biggest supporter gives me the strength to get through any challenge God throws our way.

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About Us

We met in college in the fall of 2005. Our majors were the same, so we had similar course schedules during our first two years. Although we didn’t spend much time outside of class initially, we grew close during our time spent in the classroom. This eventually led to our first date, and then the rest of our lives together. Today, we enjoy a wide range of activities, but our favorite thing is anything we do with our children. Our evenings usually consist of a walk/bide ride around our neighborhood or soccer/gymnastics.  We often host and coordinate get-togethers with family and close friends, which our kids love because they get to see all of their friends! We have a great time traveling as a family and look forward to experiencing different adventures through our kids’ eyes.  We make sure we get to take at least one family vacation a year. Sophia, and soon to be Tucker, have a say in what journey we will go on next!

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Our Relationship with Our Children's Birth Mothers

We discussed with both birth moms, prior to our children’s birth, what their desired continued communication was.  In each case, communication was more frequent at the start, but as time has gone on, we communicate as frequently as comfortable for each birth mother.  Caly continues to reach out on Mother’s Day & the kids’ birthdays, but for their own reasons, we don’t usually hear back. Both birth mothers have older children and one of them has a younger child that they are parenting. We continue to try and maintain communication so that later in life, our children can meet their siblings and birth mother if desired by the kids and birth family.   We are open to sharing pictures and updates and even visits if that is what you decide.

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Our Home and Families

We are blessed to have a home that is perfect to raise a large family.  We live in a 5-bedroom, 3-bath home, sitting on a cul-de-sac, in the Midwest. We have a large kitchen that opens up into the living room area, which is perfect for family dance parties while dinner cooks, and a dining room with a large table that is perfect for large family and friends’ gatherings and game nights.  Our home is very spacious with a living room and family room that have been taken over completely by the kids. We also have a two-car garage, a walkout deck, fireplace, and about a half-acre, partially fenced in.  Our neighborhood is located right on the outskirts of town and full of young kids that play like to play together.

The majority of our extended family lives within half an hour of us.  We also have a very close group of friends that we consider part of our family that live close by as well.  Our family and friends are very large and important parts of our lives.  They have been instrumental in our development as individuals and as a couple.  Each week we look forward to dinner with Caly’s grandparents at a local favorite restaurant and weekly hangouts with close friends.  Our kids are (and future children will be) blessed with loving great-grandparents, grandparents, aunts and uncles, cousins and several special “aunts and uncles.”  Holidays will be spent as a family visiting all of our grandparents.  Our families have numerous cookouts that often result in very competitive wiffle ball games throughout the year.  We take turns with our friends hosting annual Fourth of July, Halloween and Christmas parties, which continue to grow each year as everyone expands their family.  We have been blessed with an amazing extended family and group of friends with who we are excited to share with our children.

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Our Lifestyle

A normal week in our lives is busy, but full of fun activities for our family.  We both work full-time jobs so the kids are in daycare together at an in-home daycare, which they both love. Our nights are filled with walks during warm weather before dinner, cooking dinner while having a family dance party in the kitchen, bath-time and end with bedtime stories before the kids go to sleep.  Sophia has started soccer and gymnastics, so we’re busy running to practices or games during those seasons.  In addition, once a week we have dinner with Papa & Mama (Caly’s parents) at our favorite restaurants.  On the weekend, we focus on family activities which include golfing, swimming, playing at the park or getting together with friends and family.  We end the weekend with church on Sunday and usually a lazier day to rest up before the week starts over.

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Racial Diversity

We understand as Caucasian parents raising African American children that we have a responsibility and desire to make sure our children feel like they belong and are safe.  We have friends that have adopted racially diverse children and we get together with them frequently.  We also understand the importance of our children having role models that are of the same ethnicity as they and have made this a priority in our life.  The kids’ pediatrician is African American and has become a valuable resource and friend for us, going above and beyond the normal medical questions.  Our children’s hairstylist is African American and we have friends that are African American that have also been adopted by Caucasian parents. We continue to be a part of an adoptive families’ network in our community where our children see other families that look just like ours.  We know we have a responsibility to prepare our children for challenges they may face and educate ourselves on understanding what those challenges may be.  We are committed to doing everything in our power to make this world safer and ensure that our children will not be limited by others based on the color of their skin.

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Our Traditions

We have started several traditions with our family and look forward to adding more as our kids grow.  We make an annual trip to the zoo for their birthday – a family favorite! On Christmas Eve, we continued a tradition that Caly’s family did growing up and everyone in the family gets an ornament and book to open on Christmas Eve – plus we have put our own spin and added matching pj’s!  Also, around Christmas time, the kids always help Caly decorate inside, and Lucas goes above and beyond outside to add something new to surprise the kids each year. Throughout the year we take one family vacation with just us and then usually one friend’s vacation with kiddos.   During the summer, our college friends have an annual wiffle ball game that has changed over the years as we all continue to expand our family.  This is an event everyone in the family looks forward to as our kids have all grown very close.  As we continue to educate ourselves being a multi-cultural family, we are starting to create traditions around Black History Month and are very open to incorporating traditions of future birth parents or their families.

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Our Promise to You

We promise that your child will be loved and raised to understand the noble sacrifice that you had to make in trusting them with us.  We are committed to providing a safe, loving and nurturing home that your child would be raised in.  We promise to continue to challenge and educate ourselves to make sure we are prepared to support our children as they start to ask more questions about their adoption journey.

Message Lucas and Caly

  • Date Format: MM slash DD slash YYYY
  • Hi, We are honored that you are considering us! Lisa, our adoption specialist at Adoption Network, will be reaching out to make sure your needs are being met and your questions about adoption are being answered. She will help us get in touch with each other. We can’t wait to connect with you!

Contact Lucas and Caly

  • Date Format: MM slash DD slash YYYY
  • Hi, We are honored that you are considering us! Lisa, our adoption specialist at Adoption Network, will be reaching out to make sure your needs are being met and your questions about adoption are being answered. She will help us get in touch with each other. We can’t wait to connect with you!