The adoption process can be a wild ride. Here’s our story. Eleven years ago, I was in the midst of my first pregnancy. Each week that passed was joyful. I practically skipped to work from the bus stop and shopped for maternity clothes the minute my belly popped. On the weekends, my husband and I…
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It finally happened…someone told me they were pregnant and instead of jealousy, sadness and thoughts of why? I truly felt joy! I know that may seem silly, weird, or even selfish to some of you. But I know there are many of you out there that are unable to conceive and wondering when that day will happen for you.…
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I was the only child out of seven placed for adoption by my birth mother. Labeled a ‘troubled woman’, my birth mother had two daughters before me and went on to have three more children after I was adopted. When I first found out I was adopted, I was told that I had another sibling—my…
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Whether you’re gay or straight, or your child is adopted or biologically yours, there are things our families have in common. “I can’t believe I’m already doing this,” I said to myself as I opened the top drawer of a dresser we have only had for a month. But it was time. Alexander is three months…
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They say the pain will go away. But this birth mother regrets her choice. “If they offered to give Cricket back, would you want him?” My mother asks me this every so often. She asked again after my last Skype call with Cricket—I think it had been a year since she last asked—a new record.…
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Open adoption varies because no two adoptions look alike. Open adoption is based on the type and amount of contact the birth parents and adoptive parents have agreed to during and after the adoption process. When it comes to open adoption relationships, people are curious. Many have asked me, “What do you say to your…
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My 4 year old wants to meet her birth mom. It came. The question I thought I would have a couple of years to prepare myself for came. While in the car, my 4 year old daughter expressed a desire to meet her birth mom. At bedtime a few days later she said her birth…
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Adoption means many things to many people, none more animated than those in the adoption triad. What does adoption mean to me as a birthmom? This question has been rolling around without me realizing it until someone suggested I write an article about it. Even within the birthmother community, views and attitudes vary widely. Some…
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Adopted child acting out? Experiencing adopted child temper tantrums? If so, there’s a chance you’ve heard the words “You’re not my real mom!” What do you do when your adopted child hates you? Adoptee Keith Cousins provides reassurance for adoptive parents and shares his unique perspective about surviving the teen years with your adopted son.…
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Since my husband is infertile we had 0% chance of conceiving I am starting to slowly realize that I am an “oddity” both in the fertile and infertile worlds. Unlike other adoptive moms who share their stories of medicines, shots, various procedures and surgery—my husband is infertile and he experienced many of those. I only…
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Since becoming a transracial family through adoption, I have been asked a lot of questions by couples waiting to adopt or just starting the process. I’ve decided to address the most common questions about transracial adoption with the hope of helping others with similar questions. Please keep in mind I am just one opinion—there are…
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There’s something inherently nerve-racking about going to court. There is always anticipation, a little nervousness, some mixed emotions, and a few nice outfits dotted about. Finalization Day is no exception! It is, however, something to respect more than fear. It’s a day of uniting, of transitioning, and of closure all at once. So what should…
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Adoption is much more common than you think, but due to the lack of representation in most media forms, save for shock value, adoption is still viewed as highly rare. Most people only have experience with families where the parents and children are biologically related, so it makes some sense that the idea of…
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I just read an article on The Salt Lake Tribune about Open Adoption and it was informative. For those of you who don’t know, the adoption practices of Utah, in comparison with other states, has been called in to question; what that question is has morphed into something uglier and bigger than it needs to…
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You may think that the only way to help children in the foster care system is to become a foster parent or to adopt them. While these are certainly worthy acts of helpfulness and kindness, they are not the only things you can do to help these children in need. Perhaps you don’t have the…
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