Honoring and Supporting Birthmothers
Do you need post-placement support?
The Best For You by Kelsey Stewart

The Best For You by Kelsey Stewart

This heart warming book is aimed to help children and parents understand what one birth mother was thinking when she decided to place her child for adoption. Written in her perspective, she tell sher child the reasons why she chose adoption. A great conversation starter for parents.

Good Girls Don't by Patti Hawn

Good Girls Don't by Patti Hawn

 As a teen-ager she becomes pregnant by her high school boyfriend. In the typical "solution" of the era, she is sent away to a relative's home to have the baby in secret. Patti gives up her infant son on the day he is born. This is where the typical adoption story begins..and ends. Many years later, after a life that led her throughout the world in search of answers, she found the baby she gave up. In GOOD GIRLS DON'T Patti finds resolve and acceptance in a life that at first glance appears full of imperfection.

Lifegivers: Framing the Birthparent Experience in Open Adoption by James L. Gritter

Lifegivers: Framing the Birthparent Experience in Open Adoption by James L. Gritter

I bought this book two years ago after adopting my son. We have a fully open adoption and I was struggling with how to interact with my son's birthmother. I didn't want to compound her grief but I didn't want to ignore it either. Today my son is almost 3. I picked up this book again and read it the whole way through again. This book is a must read for adoptive parents who are trying to understand the birthparent experience.

Restorative Grief: A Guide to Healing the Birth Mothers Heart by Cynthia Christenson

Restorative Grief: A Guide to Healing the Birth Mothers Heart by Cynthia Christenson

Birth mother grief is a type of grief many don't know at all, yet some know all too well. The author, Cynthia Christensen, trudged through her own grief after the adoption of her son, Joshua. Being a private person, she did not want to do one-on-one counseling so she decided to travel the path with only one counselor -- Jesus. Walking alongside Jesus proved to be not only healing, but restorative and life changing. Restorative Grief is a Bible study written for the sole purpose of restoring broken hearts and shattered lives, by dealing with the pain of separation that follows the extremely emotional events leading up to the relinquishment of a child.

Birthmothers: Women Who Have Relinquished Babies for Adoption Tell Their Stories by Merry Jones

Birthmothers: Women Who Have Relinquished Babies for Adoption Tell Their Stories by Merry Jones

Birthmothers presents intimate and stirring accounts of more than seventy women who surrendered babies for adoption. It follows their lives long-term, from discovery of their pregnancies through the present, and identifies the Birthmother Syndrome—a pattern of behavior and emotions resulting from surrender. With heartwarming candor, Birthmothers reveals the stories of the invisible side of the adoption triangle, and touches everyone involved in adoption, as well as anyone interested in motherhood, family, and women in our society.

The Third Choice: A Woman's Guide to Placing a Child for Adoption by Leslie Foge

The Third Choice: A Woman's Guide to Placing a Child for Adoption by Leslie Foge

Recognizing the absence of written materials for women considering adoption, Ms. Foge and Ms. Mosconi were determined to produce a guidebook that would provide answers, support and guidance. After being out of print for almost two years, the authors have re-written and self-published the second edition of this important book. The second edition expands on the original concepts, deepens the ideas set forth in the first edition and includes a comprehensive resource guide. The Third Choice, Second Edition, is a wonderful tool for women seeking support during a difficult time.

Given in Love: For Mother's Who are Choosing an Adoption Plan by Maureen Connelly

Given in Love: For Mother's Who are Choosing an Adoption Plan by Maureen Connelly

For Mothers who are choosing an adoption plan. This lovely book is one you want if you work with young mothers choosing an adoption plan. Includes Decisions, Mementos, Naming, Saying Goodbye, A Letter to Baby, and Adoptive Parents. Includes a healing service for giving a child in love.

Sam's Sister by Juliet C. Bond

Sam's Sister by Juliet C. Bond

Five year-old Rosa suspects that something is wrong with her mama. What she discovers brings immense joy and sadness to her tiny family. Mama is pregnant, but she cannot keep the baby. Instead, she’s arranging an open adoption. Join Rosa as she navigates her mother’s grief, meets the family who will adopt her baby brother, and learns ways to cope with her own feelings of loss. Like so many birth siblings, Rosa embarks on a quest to accept that, even though she won’t live with her brother, she will always be, Sam’s Sister.

Revealing You: A Journal for Birthmothers by Michelle Thorne

Revealing You: A Journal for Birthmothers by Michelle Thorne

Revealing You is a journey through personal discovery, emotional awareness, and spiritual healing after placing a child for adoption. It is a space to be and feel with freedom and honesty. This journal will challenge birthmothers to process through the rough waters of placing a child for adoption and facilitate healing as they write. With a wide variety of topics specific to birthmothers post-placement, this valuable resource can be used individually, for one-on-one counseling, or in a group setting.Revealing You is written by a birthmother who ‘gets it’ for birthmothers who need to know they are not alone. This is a train you don’t get off of, and birthmothers will need help. Revealing You can help, because, friend, your story isn’t over yet!

Being You: A Journal for Birthmothers by Michelle Thorne

Being You: A Journal for Birthmothers by Michelle Thorne

BEING YOU is a journal for birthmothers, who need help navigating their open adoption relationship. It follows REVEALING YOU, which was an exploration of the 'new normal' a woman experiences once she has placed a child for adoption. BEING YOU focuses more on relationships after placement. Birthmoms now will have access to the 'how' to have healthy relationships with others post-placement, including their child, their child's adoptive parents, dating, marriage, and their child's siblings. BEING YOU covers topics like fitting in vs. belonging, pregnancy after placement, sibling connections, and healthy conflict. It creates a space to process the long-term effects of being a birthmother and think through how to engage in the adoption relationship throughout the life of the child.

The Book of Answers from your Birth Mother: A guided journal for Birthmothers to share thier life story by Jenny Lynn Delaney

The Book of Answers from your Birth Mother: A guided journal for Birthmothers to share thier life story by Jenny Lynn Delaney

The perfect open adoption gift book! The Book of Answers, a guided journal for birthmothers to share thier life story is a loving opportunity for adopted children to hear in thier birthmother's life story in the birthmother's voice.The journal addresses so many questions adoptive children may have regarding thier birth parents. 

b-mother by Maureen O'Brien

b-mother by Maureen O'Brien

A touching life story of a woman who places her baby for adoption.

Born With Teeth: A Memoir by Kate Mulgrew

Born With Teeth: A Memoir by Kate Mulgrew

At 22, just as her career was taking off, Mulgrew became pregnant and gave birth to a daughter. Having already signed the adoption papers, she was allowed only a fleeting glimpse of her child. As her star continued to rise, her life became increasingly demanding and fulfilling, a whirlwind of passionate love affairs, life-saving friendships, and bone-crunching work. Through it all Mulgrew remained haunted by the loss of her daughter until, two decades later, she found the courage to face the past and step into the most challenging role of her life both on and off screen.

Saying Goodbye to a Baby: Birthparents Guide to Loss and Grief in Adoption (Saying Goodbye to a Baby Vol. 1) Patricia Roles

Saying Goodbye to a Baby: Birthparents Guide to Loss and Grief in Adoption (Saying Goodbye to a Baby Vol. 1) Patricia Roles

Society does not always recognize the right and the need of birthparents to grieve. Until recently, they were told that they would forget their child, get on with their lives, and have other children later on.

Surrendered Child: A Birth Mother’s Journey by Karen Salyer McElMurray

Surrendered Child: A Birth Mother’s Journey by Karen Salyer McElMurray

Surrendered Child is Karen Salyer McElmurray's raw, poignant account of her journey from her teen years, when she put her newborn child up for adoption, to adulthood and a desperate search for the son she never knew. In a patchwork narrative interwoven with dark memories from her childhood, McElmurray deftly treads where few dare into a gritty, honest exploration of the loss a birth mother experiences.

Pregnant? Adoption Is an Option: Adoption from the Birthparents' Perspective by Jeanne Warren Lindsay

Pregnant? Adoption Is an Option: Adoption from the Birthparents' Perspective by Jeanne Warren Lindsay

Discusses adoption as an option for pregnant young women who do not have the resources to parent well, exploring how such a solution could affect the birthmother, the child, and the father

Out of the Shadows: Birthfathers' Stories by Mary Martin Mason

Out of the Shadows: Birthfathers' Stories by Mary Martin Mason

Dear Birthmother by Kathleen Silver & Phyllis Speedlin

Dear Birthmother by Kathleen Silver & Phyllis Speedlin

This is the third revised edition of the open adoption classic recommended by the Child Welfare League of America. Gently provocative, warm and convincing, this open adoption guide includes actual letters between adoptive parents and birthparents, and between the latter and the children they have.

 Birth Fathers and their Adoption Experiences by Gary Clapton

Birth Fathers and their Adoption Experiences by Gary Clapton

Virtually all literature about birth parents of adopted children has focused on mothers. In this pioneering study, Gary Clapton gives us a fresh perspective: he recounts the experiences of thirty birth fathers separated from their children at birth.

Because I Loved You: A Birthmother's View of Open Adoption by Patricia Dischler

Because I Loved You: A Birthmother's View of Open Adoption by Patricia Dischler

For the first time, a birthmother shares a story where regrets are replaced with respect, pain is replaced with love, and secrecy is replaced with honesty. Author Patricia Dischler provides a poignant and moving narrative, notable for its honesty. Patricia chose an open adoption arrangement for her son Joe in 1985. He is now an adult and their story has come full circle.

I Choose This Day: Mournings and Miracles of Adoption by Sharon Fieker | Dec 19, 2006

I Choose This Day: Mournings and Miracles of Adoption by Sharon Fieker | Dec 19, 2006

She includes the challenges and blessings surrounding her pregnancy. The heartache of 'not knowing' what happened to her baby and the beautiful story that unfolds as she meets her birth daughter are inspirational. When going through difficult times, Sharon sometimes wondered how God could allow such troubling things to happen. Her story demonstrates how He had a plan for her-one filled with hope. He also allowed her free will to make her own choices. If you're facing or have faced an unplanned pregnancy, you will benefit from reading I Choose this Day: Mournings and Miracles of Adoption.

To Keera with Love: Abortion, Adoption, or Keeping the Baby, the Story of One Teen’s Choice by Kalya Becker

To Keera with Love: Abortion, Adoption, or Keeping the Baby, the Story of One Teen’s Choice by Kalya Becker

Pregnant and single, Kalya M. Becker was luckier than many teenagers. She had the support of her family and a group of good friends to help her through her pregnancy. When she was a senior at a Catholic high school, she learned she was going to have a baby. The father, hundreds of miles away at a military base, said, "Get an abortion. It's the only answer."

Reunion: A Year in Letters Between a Birthmother and the Daughter She Couldn’t Keep by Katie Hern

Reunion: A Year in Letters Between a Birthmother and the Daughter She Couldn’t Keep by Katie Hern

After decades of separation, 26-year-old adoptee Katie Hern writes to her birthmother, Ellen McGarry Carlson. Written over a course of one year, this book follows the women's progress - from elation to understanding to accepting - and efforts to create an honest relationship. After several months, mother and daughter finally meet face-to-face in an emotional and exhilarating reunion.

Dancing Naked by Shelley Hrdlitschka

Dancing Naked by Shelley Hrdlitschka

Kia is sixteen and pregnant. Her world crumbles as she attempts to come to terms with the life growing inside her and what she must do. Initially convinced that abortion is her only option, Kia comes to understand that for her, the answers are not always black and white. As the pregnancy progresses, Kia discovers who her real friends are and where their loyalties lie. It is through her relationship with the elderly Grace that she learns what it means to take responsibility for one's life and the joy that can come from trusting oneself. 

Another Choice: A compassionate Guide to Placing a Child for Adoption

Another Choice: A compassionate Guide to Placing a Child for Adoption

Each year thousands of women choose to make an adoption plan when faced with an unplanned or untimely pregnancy. They often do this with little or no information about how the process works, or what the emotional, physical, and financial implications might be for making that decision.

Another Choice is a step-by-step guide to the entire process of placing a child for adoption. It discusses everything you need to know to ensure that you are making the best decision for yourself and your child, including how to find an ethical and empathetic adoption provider, how to talk to the birthfather about adoption, and how to find the best adoptive family. Most importantly, the authors discuss the emotional journey of placing a child for adoption, and provide real life examples and quotes from women who have already traveled this path so that you know you are not alone.