Origin Stories and Adoption

At times, origin stories and adoption intertwine.My placed son, Cricket, has become very interested in origin stories. He shares with me a love of caped crusaders. His interest is particularly in how superheroes and villains came to be. Many include origin stories and adoption. He told me about some of the stories he has learned. His adoptive mom read to me a couple of the origin stories he has created. My favorite was Morning Glory who had a formative experience with vines and now has all the p...

Competition in the Adoption Community

Sometimes I feel like there is this underlying force in the adoption community. I hate that it is there. I do all I can to fight it. I do all I can to stay as far away from it as possible…but sometimes, it’s just there.I don’t know when, why, or how competition snuck it’s ugly little head into the adoption world, but it did. Maybe it’s because of social media? The need to have more “likes” than the next page, more comments on your blog post, an amount of page views you can brag about? Who k...

Creating a Village: How You Can Start an Adoption Support Group

Five years ago, I was struggling to find my footing as a new, adoptive mother. My husband and I had just adopted our first child, and I was desperate to find support beyond just the adoption books and blogs I had been reading. I craved face-to-face interaction with women who understood what it is like to constantly be asked, “Is she your real child?” and “How much does adoption cost?” and “Why didn’t you have your own kids?”My search to find an existing support group didn’t yield what...

Ask the Adoption Coach: Working with Multiple Agencies

Reader: Do most people work with multiple agencies at the the same time?Adoption Coach:Dear Reader:Thank you for your question. You asked if “most” people work with multiple agencies at once. And the answer is that there really isn’t much data to verify an answer.First, some agencies do not allow prospective adoptive parents (PAPs) to use more than one agency. However, if it is allowed, the issue many run into is that doing so can be costly. Most agencies have application fees, their own require...

Adoption Story: Worth The Wait

I remember the day of our failed adoption opportunity so well – not just because of the emotional toll but because there was an ice storm in Texas. My husband, Drew, and I had flown to Texas on high hopes. Our birth mother was ready to deliver a baby boy, and we were to check into a hotel and wait for her call after delivery. Up to this point, we had been in touch with the birth mother, and had been for months. She had three children already and this fourth would upset the dynamic, s...