Frank and Amanda

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From Us to You

We would like to begin by telling you how much we admire your courage, love, and selflessness as you think of your child’s future. We can only imagine what a difficult decision and time this may be. It is our hope we can introduce ourselves to you and you can get to know us as you begin this journey to plan for the care of your future child.

We have been married since 2014. Frank is a research scientist at a university in the school of medicine. Amanda is an occupational therapist and currently a stay-at-home mom. We are a family of three, with one biological son, Vincent, who is six years old. Vincent started Kindergarten this fall. Nurturing and watching him grow is a precious experience.

We both come from close families, and family is very important to us. We treasure the love, the laughter, and the memories that we have with our parents, siblings and extended family. Growing our family with another child has been something we have been dreaming about. We want to continue to spread love, share laughter and create memories. We want Vincent to have that special bond you have with a brother or sister.

We are unable to have more children biologically and have thoughtfully considered and chosen adoption to grow our family. We are very excited about the opportunity to welcome another member to our family. We are eager to provide another child with love and care and create even more special experiences and memories together as a family.

Doing things together is a high priority. We play together, cook and eat together, work together. We love spending time outdoors and one will often find all of us outside doing yardwork, gardening, playing games, going to the park, or having picnics on our back porch. Inside the house, the fun keeps going. Vincent brings his brilliant imagination to life and we join in creating stories of “knights in shining armor”, building cities out of blocks and going on safaris in search of dangerous creatures (aka stuffed animals). Reading together is a favorite activity. Every night before bed we all curl up on the couch and read some stories. With all the play and work we do, one cannot forget to eat! Sitting down all together for dinner every night is a highlight. Most Saturday mornings we will start the day off right, whipping up a yummy breakfast treat such as homemade pancakes, waffles, or muffins. Also on weekends we cook together making homemade pasta, pizza or Frank loves to cook something on the grill or the meat smoker. And if we can, we love to share our meals with some of our friends and neighbors. The more the merrier in our book!

We want you to know that love, respect, and good education are values we hold strongly as being part of raising a sound family. We are devoted to showing attention, love, support, fostering knowledge through many experiences to our children to help them develop their talents and abilities to the fullest. We are comfortable with the possibilities of open adoption and how to start and maintain a relationship that is best for everyone.

Thank you for taking the time to “meet us” and view a sneak peek into our lives. We wish the best for you and your child.

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About Amanda

There are three opportune words to describe Amanda in this context: resilient, loving and patient.

In the course of knowing Amanda, I have seen how resilient she is when turbulence happens. Part of this is her ability to be even-tempered and pragmatic when decisions are needed. She consistently has the ability to move forward, which can be predicated on her faith background.

One of the reasons I fell in love with her was she internally loves everyone. She has this ability to smile, intently listen, and care for all individuals she engages with. Moreover, this has benefited our son, as he has learned these qualities from Amanda while developing a strong family dynamic.

Over the last couple of years during COVID, Amanda has been outnumbered at home with my job shifting to virtual. She has been beyond patient with the trials and tribulations of my work, while teaching our son from home. Throughout this she remains even-keeled and responsive to all our needs.

A quick story: The day of our wedding, my best man asked me why I love Amanda. Among the many reasons I gave, the one that makes me smile, because I knew before she was a mother, that she was going to be an amazing mom.

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About Frank

Words that describe Frank: hard-working, dependable, loyal, goofy, stubborn, loving, driven, kind, curious, generous, the list of adjectives could go on but let me try and paint a picture more of how/why these words describe Frank.

For Frank family means everything and is his number one priority. When Frank talks about family, he doesn’t just mean blood-related, family extends way beyond that. If you are “part of the family” you know you can count on Frank to be there. He will do anything to help his family out, without hesitation. There are times when someone has been sick so he sends them soup; if someone has had a bad day, he sends them chocolate cake; if someone helped him out, he sends them flowers or cookies to say thank you; if someone is down and out, he provides the support they need to help them reach their goals; if someone needs a listening ear and advice, he will listen to them for hours.

Frank is naturally a provider and protector. He works hard to make sure his family is safe, healthy and cared for. Since being married and starting our family, never once have I felt any doubt or concern that we are not going to be safe and have all our needs taken care of. I still remember the moment I knew Frank was “the one”. We were dating long distance and he had made the drive to come see me, I had to work late that night and had a horrible day with a stressful and scary commute home. When I got to my place, I was shaking, tired and stressed but there was Frank standing in the street next to my apartment and as soon as I saw him, all the stress and worry went away, he gave me a big hug and I knew everything was going to be okay.

Another reason I love and admire Frank is the fact that he does not give-up. He may be faced with roadblocks, obstacles etc. but if anything, this makes him fight harder. He doesn’t like to talk about this much, but several years ago, Frank was paralyzed from the waist down due to an infection after a spinal surgery. He had to learn how to walk all over again. Less than 8 months later, Frank hiked up a mountain with a buddy in Colorado. For Frank one can say about him “Ain’t No Mountain High Enough”.

In summary, Frank makes those around him smile, laugh, feel loved, cared for, and I can’t forget to mention, no one goes away hungry if Frank is around!

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About Vincent

Vincent is six years old and is in kindergarten. Vincent is full of energy and seems to never stop. He likes to play soccer, hide and seek, “fight dragons” that might be terrorizing the neighborhood, he takes on “secret identities” as various superheroes to save the day, he loves to ride his scooter and has just started learning to ride a bike. Vinent loves the water! Splashing in puddles after a good rainstorm is a favorite and he is always ready to jump in the pool, lake or ocean. He was super excited to take swim lessons this summer.

He is an imaginative child, who loves to play dress-up, make- up stories of dragons, superheroes and treasure hunts. He loves books and loves to learn. Amanda and Vincent often have “learning time” together when they explore a topic of interest to Vincent, often space, truck or animal related. He is very inquisitive and a sponge for soaking up new facts. Most importantly, Vincent is very caring, empathetic, and helpful. His preschool teachers frequently commented on how the other kids always wanted to be around Vincent, how he comforted them when they were sad, and that everyone just laughed and smiled more on the days Vincent was at school.

He loves to help mom around the house with different cleaning tasks. One of his new favorite things to do is help his younger cousin. When he is around his baby cousin, the compassion and kindness he shows is heart touching. He loves to teach “Baby Ollie” all new things, hold him, help feed him, and comfort him. We know he will be an excellent big brother and will hold this title and responsibility with pride.

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How We Met

Our “love story” could be a Hallmark film we often joke. We first met back around 2009. Amanda was working in southern Illinois, and Frank was attending grad school. Frank was assigned an internship position at Amanda’s place of work and were working with some of the same clients. This young student guy had the audacity to tell Amanda “the experienced therapist” what she was doing wrong. Let’s just say that didn’t go over too swell. We tolerated each other through the rest of his internship.

Flash forward 3 years and Amanda is at a new place of employment in a big city in the northern part of Illinois, when a new patient shows up, guess who, yep Frank. He had suffered a spinal infection and lost his ability to walk, and had to learn it all over again. Amanda was one of the therapists who had to help him do so. God works in mysterious ways, we got over our differences, after his rehab started dating and the rest is history. In many ways we are exact opposites, but we believe this is what makes us work so well together. We truly balance each other out as well as challenge each other and force one another to look at things in a different perspective. This has helped both of us grow as individuals and makes our relationship strong.

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Why We are Choosing to Adopt

We talked about children and our family dreams from the beginning of our relationship. We both wanted to have children but also knew it might not happen the “typical way”. Frank has a genetic disease and did not want to pass that along to his children if possible. Genetic counseling, IVF and adoption were all means of this and were discussed openly right from the start. After we were married and were ready to start growing our family, we first decided to go ahead with genetic counseling and IVF. This blessed us with our son Vincent.

We want Vincent to have the experiences and relationships we shared with our siblings and so wanted to grow our family. We again attempted IVF; however this was not successful and eventually decided that we might need a new path for growing our family. After much thought and prayer, we decided that adoption was going to be the best path for growing our family. We look forward with eager and open arms and hearts to welcome another bundle of joy to our family.

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Our Home and Neighborhood

We live in a three-story house with three bedrooms. The first floor is where we spend most of our time together as a family. In the kitchen, we cook up many memories making breakfast together on the weekends and trying our hand at homemade pasta and pizza. Amanda also loves to bake many tasty treats! The living room is where we cuddle up for story time, play games or have dance parties with the record player. We have a very diverse love of music ranging from rock-n-roll, jazz, and sometimes even a little opera! Off from the main living area you will see a small playroom where imagination and creativity come to life with games, toys and arts and crafts.

The 2nd floor is where we spend our time in sweet dreams. Traveling up to the third floor is the “office”. Part of it is Frank’s home office as he primarily works from home. The other half he shares with Amanda, where she likes to escape to her “craft room” and get creative making homemade cards and other projects.

We love our neighborhood. It is kid-oriented, beautiful and friendly. It is a place where children can ride their bikes to school or to their friend’s house. Every weekend during the summer someone is hosting a lemonade stand or bake sale. We have a yearly tradition with a group of neighbors called “Soup Night”. Every Sunday night during the cold winter months we take turns hosting and gathering together for soup. The kids run together and play while the adults sit around and enjoy great food and company.

Not only is this neighborhood a fun and friendly place to live and grow up, but it has a great education system, and we live just a few blocks from school. We can walk and ride our bikes!

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Our Lifestyle

What does a day in the life of our family look like…. hmmm, well, we are pretty easy going, we like our routines but are up for trying new things. We love to work and play together. We definitely are a team and share the responsibilities of maintaining a happy home. A typical weekday starts with breakfast and then off to work, school or play. Frank has a “long commute” up 2 flights of stairs to his home office. Vincent and Amanda then either scurry off to school or spend the days seeking out “adventures” whether that means running errands, doing things around the house, “learning time” which is Amanda and Vincent learning about animals, doing science experiences, making craft projects or other fun play activities that encourage learning and growth. Sometimes bigger adventures are included such as berry picking at a nearby orchard, hiking through the many local parks we have, riding a bike or scooter, going to the library, the list could go on.

After school and work is over for the day, and Frank “commutes home”, he and Vincent hang out while Amanda gets dinner ready. We sit down together as a family for dinner every night. After cleaning up, the evening is wrapped up with some TV time, followed by game or puzzle time, and then right before bed we always curl up on the couch together for story time.

On weekends there might be a little sleeping in, but Amanda is an early bird and still usually up with the sunrise. We love to cook up something special for breakfast on Saturdays such as pancakes, waffles, or French toast. We often follow that with Facetime chats with our family, as they live far away, and then include some music time playing records, we have a very eclectic taste of music. The rest of the day is filled with whatever we can “cook up” together.

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Our Traditions

Holiday traditions are big for both of our families, for different holidays. Amanda loves Christmas and spends 2-3 days decorating the house. She has collected Christmas ornaments from every place she has visited and nativity scenes from around the world. Baking and decorating Christmas cookies is a must, as well as wrapping presents, stuffing stockings with “gifts from Santa” and “rocking around the Christmas” tree singing all sorts of Christmas carols. And of course, the Christmas Eve church service is a favorite childhood memory of hers and is continued to this day. Her second favorite holiday is Easter and the “Easter bunny” is a very tricky fellow in the Buono household, just ask Frank how long it takes him to find his Easter basket.

For Frank’s family Hannukah is a big celebration when family and friends gather together for good food, gifts, lighting of the Menorah and exchanging of gifts. While they are not extremely religious, the emphasis of family events is more important. Frank’s mom will customarily bring out xeroxed copies of why we celebrate Hannukah, with missing pages, which always brings us to distracted conversations, and many laughs are shared.

Frank’s favorite holiday is Halloween! The front porch is decorated, pumpkins are carved and he dresses up to greet the kids for Trick or Treat. To his delight, Halloween is a big celebration in our neighborhood. Literally hundreds of kids race through the neighborhood and many houses go all out making their yards into haunted houses and mazes, mini-theatrical plays.

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Our Families

We currently don’t live near either of our families or where either of us grew up. Although there are miles between us, we truly remain close to both of our families. We remain close through regular in person visits, whether that is us traveling back to “home” or grandparents and aunts and uncles coming to visit us. Besides the in-person visits there are regular phone chats, Facetime calls, texts and we are still a fan of “snail mail”!

Frank grew up in Northern Illinois. His mom and sister with her husband and one-year old son continue to live in the area. Frank has a large extended family who all live in the Chicagoland area. When we get to spend time with them it is full of good food, abundance of love and lots of laughter. Frank’s sister and her husband have a one-year-old, who is always happy.

Amanda spent the early part of her childhood growing up in Southern California and then around middle school her family moved to southeastern Michigan. All of her family now live in Wisconsin. She has 2 younger brothers. The youngest is married with 2 boys 7 and 10 years old. Her middle brother was born with disabilities and so still lives with Mom and Dad. Her immediate family as well as all the cousins, aunts, uncles and even grandpa live within a 30 minute radius of one another. Getting together with all of the gang is great as there are lots of cousins and the cousins have kids ranging in years from 5 to college. Let’s just say it can get loud if the whole family is together, but the noise is music to our ears.

Both of our families are loving, like to have fun, love to share food, and will do anything to help one another out. We know that your child will be showered with big smiles, giant bear hugs, and there is no doubt that they will be protected and cared for by each and every family member.

Racial and Cultural Diversity

We believe that all individuals should be loved, respected and valued. Every person is unique and has their own personality, strengths, and character. Everyone has their own story to write. Your child will grow up with love and we will nurture their lives so they can grow to their fullest potential and live life to the fullest.

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Our Promise to You

We can only imagine how difficult this time is for you, but we want to assure you that we will raise your child to the best of our abilities. They will be raised in a loving home. They will be shown respect, encouragement, love, compassion, kindness, and will be taught to show these qualities to others. Your child will know you love them, they will know their story and it will be celebrated. They will be provided with opportunities, education and experiences to grow as an individual. Their personality, their strengths and their uniqueness as a person will be cherished and fostered. Our belief that it takes a village to raise a child could not be truer in this situation.