Nickname: Carter and Kat

Married Since: 2015

Pets: Yes

Stay at Home Parent: Yes

Other Adopted Children at Home: Yes

Other Biological Children at Home: No

You are one of the strongest women we will ever meet. It takes someone very special to have the courage and love in your heart to do what you are doing. Remember that you are strong and you are making the right decision, whatever your choice ends up being.

Carter and Kathryn

from Alabama

 

Carter

Ancestry: English

Religion: Nonpracticing

Occupation: Web Developer

Education: BS

Hobbies: Video games, Biking, Hiking, Swimming, Sports

Kathryn

Ancestry: Scottish, Irish

Religion: Presbyterian

Occupation: Stay-at-Home Mom

Education: MA

Hobbies: Reading, Swimming, Biking, Crafts

Baby

Preferred Ethnicity of Baby: African American / Asian, African American / Caucasian, African American / Hispanic, Asian, Caucasian / Asian, Asian / Hispanic, Biracial (African American + any other), Caucasian, Caucasian / Hispanic, Caucasian / Indian, Caucasian / Middle Eastern, Caucasian / Native American, Caucasian / Pacific Islander, Hispanic, Hispanic / Middle Eastern, Hispanic / Native American, Hispanic / Pacific Islander, Indian, Middle Eastern, Pacific Islander, All Races / Ethnicities, Native American Indian

Preferred Gender of Baby: Either

Religion Child To Be Raised: Christian

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From Us to You

Dear Expectant Mother,

This past year of the pandemic has been hard for so many with the uncertainty the future may hold. We can only imagine how hard it is for you to consider the decision of adoption. You are a brave, wonderful lady and any choice you make will be the right one. The only thing we can all do is support each other during difficult times. We will be there for you, support you, and get to know the wonderful person that you are who will potentially bring a miracle to our lives. You are a courageous person who is making the best decisions you can for yourself and your baby. You deserve praise, strength, and support for your choice to do what is best for you both.

We are Kat, Carter, and Cameron. We adopted Cameron in May 2019 and have an open adoption with his birth mom. We absolutely adore her and she has become like our little sister. We call her Mama K. She and Cameron talk on every holiday, important event and sometimes we just call to check on each other. Mama K placed Cameron for adoption when he was 8 months old after a long hard choice. We are blessed to have an open adoption plan with her that grew over time to what it is now. We understand that this is not what everyone may feel comfortable with and we respect that.

We know how truly blessed we are to have Cameron. We hope to adopt another child so we can love them as much as we love him. We have great plans for our children’s future fun activities. Since Kathryn has worked at camps and educational facilities, we know what programs we would like our children to attend. We also love to travel. So far we have been to 39 states, and 7 countries. We look forward to traveling the world as a family and exploring new cultures and lifestyles. We attend several local festivals that celebrate diversity and occasionally travel if one is celebrating an important event. We are raising Cameron in a gender neutral environment where we let him choose how he plays, what he watches, and how he dresses. It is our intention to continue to do so. We both grew up on Star Trek (Next Gen, Voyager, DS9) and liked how every being was treated the same while their individual skills and abilities were also valued. That is something we hope to teach him along with helping him to reach his full potential surrounded by love and support. We promise to do the same with your baby. They will feel love and support every day as they grow.

We always knew we wanted to have at least 2 children. We were unable to hold a pregnancy longer than 12 weeks. We have chosen not to explore the definite reason. Kathryn has dealt with several reproductive health issues throughout her life and long came to terms with the knowledge that becoming pregnant and staying pregnant would be difficult. After numerous miscarriages, we chose to move forward with adoption. Something we knew we would do one day regardless if we had biological children or not. Kathryn grew up around families blended with both adopted and biological family members. She knew in her heart that she wanted a similar kind of family. Carter has an aunt and a niece who are adopted and he has always considered it as a natural part of life. When we became a couple, it was one of the first things we discussed when talking about our futures together.

We currently live in North Alabama surrounded by nature just on the outside of a large city. Our house is surrounded by beautiful mountains and is walking distance to several parks, a creek, the river, and multiple playgrounds. We have created a very close community with our neighbors and a very family central lifestyle over the past year and intend to continue this even when the pandemic is over.

Carter is a computer programmer who works from home full time. He enjoys nature and is the more adventurous person out of the two of us. He is generally very quiet and has an even demeanor. He speaks when he has something to say and tends to think very logically about most things before making a decision. Kathryn is currently a stay-at-home mom but has ambitions of becoming a school teacher. She has worked for museums and camps all across the country and is looking forward to becoming a professional educator. She is outgoing, talkative, and impulsive when it comes to making decisions. As a couple, we balance each other out well and make all big decisions together and meet all life’s challenges as a team.

Carter came from a very loving family and is the middle of 3 siblings. Unfortunately, his father passed away last year. His mother is a very active grandparent in all the children’s lives. All his siblings live throughout the state and regularly meet up. Kathryn’s upbringing was challenging as the oldest of 2. Her sister lives with her husband and his family in Alaska. We visit as often as we can and video chat regularly. Kathryn and her sister do not shy away from their difficult past, but both have moved on from their parents and have built strong, stable loving relationships.

Cameron is a brilliant, funny, crazy boy. If you’ve ever seen the TV show Bluey (his favorite), he’s a Rusty. He is into all things “boy” but is practically inseparable from his best girl friend who lives across the street. They have spent the better part of 2 years together. He loves to swim and we often go wading in the local creek on hot days. He knows he is adopted and is proud to be like his big cousin (Carter’s niece who is also adopted). He has a book about his life before us and after. It’s full of pictures and memories that we often look through. We call it his special book.

The last part of our family is our pets. We have 2 dogs and 2 cats. Our dogs are Artemis (black) and Apollo (brown) are about the same age of 8 years old. They love kids and even act as babysitters sometimes. We never leave the kids alone with the dogs. They love to play catch, chase, and fetch together. Artemis is laid back and acts and snorts just like a pig. She will roll over on her back for belly rubs. Apollo thinks he’s a small dog and will do anything to be in your lap to cuddle, even though he is tall and lanky. Our cats are Ellie (fluffy grey) and Diana (black). Ellie is 12 years olds and declawed. She’s a one person cat, and her person is Kathryn. They sleep together every night. Diana is 4 years old and a princess. She loves Artemis and enjoys going outside. She is very social and will just appear. She loves playing with kids and her feather wands or strings.

We have several close knit friend groups who have their own children. Cameron is among the oldest in the set. Our friends are our family. We rely on each other and have fun together. We take vacations, plan holidays, and random dinners to celebrate our accomplishments. We help fix each other’s houses, watch kids, take care of pets, and build new things for the kids all for the low price of beer and pizza. We are truly blessed to be surrounded by such wonderful people in our lives.

We hope you have enjoyed learning about us. Thanking for considering us during this difficult decision making process. Remember whatever choice you make will be the right one. We send you our love and support as you move forward in life. You are a brilliant, wonderful person.

Sincerely,
Kat, Carter, and Cameron

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Our Lifestyle

We are opposites who balance each other well. Carter is quiet and reserved. Kathryn is outgoing and talkative. While we have different personalities, we also share many common interests. We are both nerds. We enjoy superheroes, Star Wars, Star Trek, D&D, and playing board games. Carter likes to read comic books/graphic novels. Kathryn likes to read every book she comes in contact with. We even have a library in our house. We enjoy doing outdoor activities together. We both have a sweet tooth and enjoy going to the movies. We enjoy going out with friends and traveling to new places.

Carter works from home. Kathryn is a part-time stay at home mom and entrepreneur. Carter works typical office hours in his office. Kathryn runs the household and schedules children’s activities and curriculum. We spend as much time together as a family as possible going on mini-vacations every month to just get out of town. We take a big vacation every six months or one extravagant vacation a year. We are members of all the local museums. We enjoy going to the parks and riding along the greenway by our house. We go out with friends to enjoy local events and those in the surrounding area. We live below our means to save for the future but we have a comfortable life. We enjoy learning about new places and things together as a family.

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About Kathryn

Kathryn is a very outgoing and social person who makes friends anywhere she goes. She has a loud personality and you can tell she is excited when she starts to talk very fast. Some of her hobbies are reading, gardening, cross-stitching, studying history, taking walks with family, and being social with friends. She is the planner in the family and always keeps us moving in the right direction or just out on a fun adventure. Kathryn has always wanted to be a mother and has worked with children most of her adult life. She loves to help children learn, grow, and have fun at the same time, and she exhibits this every day with Cameron. Cameron adores his mother and loves the time they spend together learning and playing or visiting Cameron’s friends for a play date. Since the pandemic, she quit her part-time job at a museum to stay home and teach Cameron and the two friends he has been quarantine with. She plans education activities and family outings where we social distance from others. Cameron has picked up her constant cleaning habits after eating and cooking, but is still working on cleaning up after his toys. Kathryn is an amazing person who has overcome many challenges in her life to build a wonderful family life and an extraordinary group of friends.

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About Carter

Carter is quiet and reserved. He speaks when he has something to say, but enjoys working in silence or listening to his podcasts. He is adventurous and likes to take small risks to explore new areas. He likes to rock climb and hike harder trails to see places people rarely see. He also likes to play video and computer games in his downtime. He is a DC universe fan. He is the most supportive person I have ever met. When I want to do something, he encourages me to think things through but in the end, I always have his unwavering support. He treats everyone around him with great respect. He is a loving son, father, and brother. He is our family’s rock. He puts us all before himself every day by doing his daily tasks and work, but can be a procrastinator and will sometimes put things off until they really need to be done. He makes sure to have a father-son day every month to show Cameron at his young age how much he loves him and enjoys being with him. He is an excellent father who takes time to show Cameron what he is doing. Carter plays sports at home with Cameron and teaches him how to put things together. Cameron loves to help his daddy, especially with mowing the lawn. Carter loves to try new things whereas I am the more cautious one. I have discovered so many new activities and skills because he encourages me to go outside my comfort zone.

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About Cameron

Cameron is 3.5 years old and a very caring boy. If you have ever seen the TV show Bluey (his favorite), he is just like Rusty. He is very into boy games but also willing to play Moms and Dads or dolls with his best girl friend across the street. They have spent the better part of the last two years together almost every day. She is 6 months older than him and they are now practically inseparable. They do dance and soccer classes together weekly as well. Cameron constantly asks about a baby and tells us how he is going to be a good big brother. He is ahead of the learning curve in motor skills and we are working on letters, numbers, and words. He loves books and reading every night before bed and will even ask for “alone time” just to read his books. He is into monster trucks, race cars, and dinosaurs are his favorite toys. Yellow is his favorite color. Currently, his favorite movies are a tie between Sonic (2020) and Toy Story (1995). He is very proud to have all the toys from Toy Story.

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Why We Are Choosing to Adopt

We attempted to have children before we wanted to adopt. We knew we would always adopt at least one child. Kathryn has always had reproductive issues. The longest she was able to carry was 3 months and has had 7 known miscarriages. We do not know exactly why we were unable to have children and prefer to keep it that way. After we completed our first adoption, we became even more convinced that we would want another child once the time was right. Recently, Cameron has become obsessed with babies and loves playing “daddy” with his toys. We began to discuss if the timing was right and became even more convinced that it was time when our family helped us in becoming able to adopt again. This will be our final adoption for now. We hope to become foster parents in the future when our children are ready and understanding. Being foster parents and adoptive parents has always been part of who we wanted to be as a couple and what we wanted to be as parents. Every child deserves a wonderful safe home. We want to provide that. Kathryn had her share of troubles growing up in a rocky household. That experience inspired us to move forward with adoption.

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Our Relationship with Cameron's Birth Mother

We have an excellent open relationship with Cameron’s Birth Mother. Cameron calls her Mama K. We started off with just open email contact and it has grown to where we have random video calls with each other. We hold similar views and just love sharing all of Cameron’s growth and skills. She is a wonderful young lady who is doing great things in life but was just not able to keep him. We consider her part of our family, like a little sister. We do have boundaries to keep a healthy relationship and we believe in honesty and open communication. We understand that Mama K needs breaks from time to time and don’t push her when we don’t hear from her for a while. We don’t think anything beyond hoping she is okay. We understand everyone processes things differently. She has had a tough life but is working hard to turn things around. We are giving her guidance as much as we can to help her. We hope to have a similar growing relationship with our other birth mother.

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Our Home and Neighborhood

One of the many blessings of the pandemic is that we have become extremely close with our neighbors. One of our neighbors is also a family with two adoptive children a few years older than Cameron. Most are NASA engineers or nurses. Cameron’s best girl friend lives across the street and is part of a blended family. We have an excellent relationship with the family and have spent most of 2020 with them specifically in quarantine however all of our neighbors have pulled together to help each other out during these times. We live within walking distance of a greenway with a shallow but wide creek. We enjoy going wading in the water, biking along the greenway, and feeding the turtles. Cameron’s future elementary and middle school is within walking distance along the greenway and we look forward to walking the kids to school along it. There are also 2 parks in opposite directions on the greenway with playgrounds and also where Cameron will take his soccer lessons. Five miles from us is the Tennessee River and its greenway connected by our local one. We have plenty of outdoor public areas nearby. At home we have a small playground area and almost every sport for kids to play. We have recently built a sun porch to enjoy being outside without getting too hot or eaten by bugs. We have built a mini-playground on the porch. We have a fruit and vegetable garden in the backyard. Two-thirds of our backyard is fenced in for our dogs. Inside the house, we have a separate game/playroom where we do fun indoor things as a family. Upstairs is our private space. Downstairs is our family area. Cameron has his own kitchen in our kitchen so he can cook while we do. We only have 2 TVs but Alexa is in every room to listen to music as we do learning activities or play.

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Our Pets

We are all big animal lovers. We have two 7-year-old dogs and one 3-year-old cat. Our dogs Apollo (brown) and Artemis (black) are 6 months apart in age. They are good dogs and our neighbors love to visit with them. They are obedience trained though we have slipped in keeping up with the fancy tricks. They love to love people. They bark but then will run up to you and sit or roll over on their backs for belly rubs. Artemis is an excellent babysitter. She is always next to Cameron watching to make sure he is always protected. Apollo is more stand-offish unless Cameron is feeding them scraps or filling their bowls. Cameron’s big chore is feeding the dogs in the morning and at night. He also helps let them outside with either of us because the child locks keep him in the house. We have a black cat named Diana. She loves Cameron. She comes and cuddles him as we read books at night before bed and helps tuck Cameron in. She does like to lay around in the main living area and just watch what everyone is doing.

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Our Family and Friends

Our friends are our family. We have a very select close-knit group of friends. Carter’s mother is very active in Cameron’s life. Carter is the middle of three children. He has an older brother who is married and they have a son 3 months older than Cameron. Carter’s younger sister has three children (one of whom is a foster child). Kathryn has a younger sister with two children. Carter’s family all live within the state and we see them often. Kathryn’s sister is in Alaska and they make sure to keep in touch despite the distance. Kathryn’s best friend Stephanie and her husband have two children close in age. Their eldest is 2 months older than Cameron. We are so close that they are our children’s guardians if anything should happen to us. Carter’s best friend Thomas and his wife just had their first child. Both of our best friends live within a half-mile of us in opposite directions. We have a blended group of friends who are extremely social and whom we do most of our adventures with. They are all in the process of having children or have had their first child. We also have several close friends in California. We met them while living out there for 4 years. Many have traveled to other parts of the country or within the state but we all remain in close contact and know we have a place to stay whenever we visit their areas.

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Our Traditions

We don’t really have traditions yet but are building them as a family. We spend Christmas and Thanksgiving with Carter’s family. We have Friendsgiving and Friendsmas/New Year parties every year around the holiday nearest to it. Other holidays we spend with Carter’s family or grill with our social friends whom we spend Friendsgiving/Friendsmas with every year. We bake cookies, play holiday games, and exchange gifts. Our wedding anniversary is around Labor Day weekend, so we take that weekend every year and travel somewhere new. One tradition that has carried over from Kathryn’s family is, as children she and her sister, would lay under the Christmas tree and look up at the twinkling lights to Christmas music as soon as the tree was finished decorating. We did it as a couple and now do it with Cameron. Carter’s family plays “find the pickle” on the Christmas tree at his parent’s house every year as well. The kids have really gotten into it.

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Our Vacations and Leisure Time

We like to take weekend trips at least once a month. Sometimes we spend the weekend; other times we are just gone for the day. We like to explore our local area and find something new and fun to do. The weekends when we are home, we like to go kayaking down a creek or small river, rent a boat to go out on the larger Tennessee River and do water sports, go to the playgrounds nearby, or attend local weekend events/festivals. We live in a larger city but still in a semi-rural area so we can enjoy the quiet of nature. On rainy or cold days, we stay home and play board games or video games. Other days we make plans to go see a movie, have a playdate, or visit a local museum. Every year we celebrate fall by going to a farm, going to Santa’s Village at Christmas time, and attending the springtime parades the city hosts. Once or twice a year we also take a week-long vacation as a family to spend time with each other and explore a new place together. We have been to Europe, Mexico, and Canada. We have also been to several large cities most notably Los Angeles, San Diego, Las Vegas, Atlanta, New Orleans, and Nashville.

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Cultural Diversity

Many of our close friends are in interracial relationships or have biracial children. We have friends of varying ethnicities. We know there is a struggle that we as white people will never understand and thus will be allies in gaining equality for all despite gender, race, or religion. We work hard with Cameron to make sure he is surrounded by people different than him both in looks and culture. We attend various cultural festivals as well to learn. We will do everything in our ability to ensure that our children grow up as progressive allies. We want a Star Trek world for our children.

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Education

Education is very important to us. Kathryn has a Master’s Degree in History with a focus on U.S. foreign relations/military history. Carter has a Bachelor’s Degree in Computer Science. We have already started putting money aside for both Cameron and our future child’s college fund. Whether they decide to attend college or trade school, we will help them pursue their educational and career goals. Kathryn has worked at several educational camps and in informal classrooms most of her working career. Cameron thrives with their activities and is ahead of the curve in some of his skills thanks to her and his language tutors (Cameron is learning to be bilingual in Spanish and English). Kathryn has the ability to read in 5 languages and understand 2 but cannot speak another language fluently. Kathryn and Cameron read books in English and Spanish together as they both really love to read. Carter is extremely good at coding and figuring out technical problems and building technology. We have each found our niche and encourage each other to continue our pursuits.

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Our Parenting Style

We are very lucky that Cameron overall for his age is a very good listener. We rarely have to discipline him. We keep him away from everything dangerous and teach him verbal warnings so he doesn’t get hurt. On the rare chance that he tries to do something dangerous, like climbing or doing something he shouldn’t because he could get seriously hurt, we stop the action immediately, get his attention, and tell him, “Cameron, you scared mommy and daddy. You could fall down and get hurt.” We have been moving away from this as he is getting older. If it is something serious now, he usually gets put in time out. Since he was little, we have given him 3 chances to make his own good choice. We start a dialogue to help him think about his actions and encourage him to make the right choice. If after 3 chances of asking him to make a good choice, we give him a time out. Our goal has always been to parent using positive reinforcement once our children are ready. We never spank Cameron. We are at the age of dealing with tantrums. If he throws a tantrum, we ignore it. He hates being ignored and prefers to be the center of attention. Cameron will usually change his behavior once he realizes he is not getting attention. The lessons are working because he is now learning to ask for things calmly and nicely. Cameron thrives under positive reinforcement parenting. Every child is different and has different needs. We hope to continue the same or similar parenting style with our next child. We want to make sure both our children get what they need from us to feel safe and loved but know their limitations.

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What We Will Share with Your Child

We absolutely adore Cameron’s birth mother. We all work hard to make our relationship as normal as possible. She is an adopted child as well and tells us all the time she wishes she had this kind of relationship with her own family. We maintain honesty with boundaries. She knows that we respect and love her. We respect her distance when she is going through tough times she tends to retreat into her shell. She knows that we will always be ready to answer her call when she comes out of it. On our side, she knows all contact goes through us and we must always be present for video chats and calls until Cameron is an adult. The story we have all agreed to share with Cameron is the simple truth. Mama K loved him so much. She tried everything to keep him and give him the best life possible, but Mama K was having a difficult time and realized that we were the best thing for him. Mom and Dad will forever love him and Mama K for giving us the greatest gift someone can give another person. If he has more questions, we all agreed that he can ask Mama K and it will be a private conversation unless one of them asks us to stay. We are so grateful that we kept in contact with her and let our relationship grow naturally. We cannot imagine our life without them both in it. We really would like to have a similar relationship with you, but we understand and respect that everyone is different. We will have our own separate relationship that we all agree with.

Message Carter and Kathryn

  • Date Format: MM slash DD slash YYYY
  • Hi, We are honored that you are considering us! Lisa, our adoption specialist at Adoption Network, will be reaching out to make sure your needs are being met and your questions about adoption are being answered. She will help us get in touch with each other. We can’t wait to connect with you!

Contact Carter and Kathryn

  • Date Format: MM slash DD slash YYYY
  • Hi, We are honored that you are considering us! Lisa, our adoption specialist at Adoption Network, will be reaching out to make sure your needs are being met and your questions about adoption are being answered. She will help us get in touch with each other. We can’t wait to connect with you!