This seemingly simple question can actually be very complicated. Is there counseling available? Sure. No problem. Will it automatically be made available to you post-placement? Not necessarily. It all depends on three factors. First, who is handling your adoption? Is it your private family attorney? An agency? Someone else? One major thing an agency has…
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What if every year, at every celebration, there was something missing? What if no one knew you felt that way? What if what was missing was knowing where and how your child was? Children are not the only ones to think about birth parents. Birth parents also think about their children. Holidays and other celebrations…
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You’ve just had a baby. You were expecting to look and feel like the celebrity moms that grace the covers of supermarket magazines—completely put together and blissfully serene. However, in reality, you feel that you are neither of these things. You don’t feel like yourself and you are having some feelings of moodiness or sadness.…
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After your baby arrives your body changes as it returns to your pre-pregnancy state. The bigger the baby, the tougher the recovery. Postpartum is from delivery to 6 weeks following delivery. But take heart—recovery after delivery won’t last forever! Physical Changes Bleeding and vaginal discharge (lochia) – Your body will continue to cleanse the uterus and…
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If you have made a private adoption plan prior to giving birth, the adoptive parents typically take the baby home directly from the hospital. In fact, as long as you agree, and your attorney or placing agency has made the arrangements, most hospitals will allow the adopting parents to visit with the baby as soon as the…
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When deciding to place a child with an adoptive family, there may be a lot of unanswered questions about what will it be like after the adoption. Here are some basic facts to give you an idea of what to expect. The biggest mystery of the adoption process for a birth mother may be what…
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At times, origin stories and adoption intertwine. My placed son, Cricket, has become very interested in origin stories. He shares with me a love of caped crusaders. His interest is particularly in how superheroes and villains came to be. Many include origin stories and adoption. He told me about some of the stories he has…
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Reader: Next month I am going to be meeting with my daughter that I placed for adoption, almost 20 years ago. We have met up once before, but in a room with 4 other people. This time it will be just her and me. I am nervous, but excited. I would love to get an…
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Reader: Any advice on how to introduce my 27-year-old birth son to my 6 & 2-year-old that have never been told that I placed a child for adoption? Adoption Coach:Dear Reader: Thank you for your question. I’m sure you are anticipating the meeting, and I applaud you for carefully considering the best way to go…
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Reader: Open adoption or private adoption? New to this site with regard to my daughter who is only 15. She has decided to put her baby up for adoption due to the circumstances and because she is only 15… so many questions! Dear Reader: First, if possible, I recommend finding an independent counselor (not one…
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Ask the Adoption Coach: Approaching Your Child’s Birth Mother About Prenatal Exposure to Substances Reader: My 9-year-old child is having difficulties, including ADD and anger issues. I’m all over it — seeing specialists and starting therapy. I was told he tested positive for marijuana at birth, which led to him being removed and, thank God,…
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Lost pregnancies, tracking cycles, scheduled sex, and injecting hormones strong enough to take down a race horse – it’s enough to make you want to… who knows… something terrible. Something unspeakable. Well, I see you. My four miscarriages make me one of you, and I have also spent many tearful nights supporting ladies like you…
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A negative experience with the birth father isn’t uncommon. Like many other birth moms, I had a negative experience with the birth father. He acted like he didn’t care. He said one thing but did another. He was constantly telling me how much he loved me and his daughter, Josie. How badly he wanted to be…
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Birth mother, Haley Kirkpatrick, shares her experience with the birth father, who wanted no involvement with the pregnancy or birth of their child. When I told the birth father that I was expecting, his first response was to try and deny that the child could be his. Even though he knew that our one sexual encounter was my…
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The world of adoption can be a confusing one for hopeful Adoptive Parents. Adoption is a legal process, but the emotions (and finances) involved and the inability to control almost every aspect can make it terrifying. Who can you trust? When you decide to take that step, to commit to the process that will build…
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