Reader: Do most people work with multiple agencies at the the same time? Adoption Coach:Dear Reader: Thank you for your question. You asked if “most” people work with multiple agencies at once. And the answer is that there really isn’t much data to verify an answer. First, some agencies do not allow prospective adoptive parents…
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Reader: What would you say are the most important things to look for when deciding on an agency to work with? Do you prefer any over others? Adoption Coach:Dear Reader: Thank you for your question. A common concern for those new to adoption is how to choose an agency. There are so many agencies to…
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Reader: How do you cope with the wait/search/disappointment? Adoption Coach:Dear Reader: Your sentiments are felt by many prospective adoptive parents. Waiting for the news that you have been referred or chosen can be incredibly frustrating, confusing, disheartening, and anxiety-inducing. It’s important that prospective adoptive parents keep three main ideas in mind while waiting. First, do…
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Reader: Next month I am going to be meeting with my daughter that I placed for adoption, almost 20 years ago. We have met up once before, but in a room with 4 other people. This time it will be just her and me. I am nervous, but excited. I would love to get an…
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Reader: We have 3 biological children and adopted a girl from Ecuador a year ago. Bonding is going slowly. It’s going slower for me than I anticipated, but even worse for the kids. They argue a lot, keep track of others wrongs and annoying habits. They compare almost everything—who has more of this or that.…
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Reader: I’ve heard that it may be possible for an adoptive mother to have a breastfeeding relationship with her child to foster bonding and attachment. Can you give me some idea of how one would go about this? Is it necessary for you to have given birth or nursed before? If it turns out you…
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Reader: Any advice on how to introduce my 27-year-old birth son to my 6 & 2-year-old that have never been told that I placed a child for adoption? Adoption Coach:Dear Reader: Thank you for your question. I’m sure you are anticipating the meeting, and I applaud you for carefully considering the best way to go…
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Reader: Open adoption or private adoption? New to this site with regard to my daughter who is only 15. She has decided to put her baby up for adoption due to the circumstances and because she is only 15… so many questions! Dear Reader: First, if possible, I recommend finding an independent counselor (not one…
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Reader: I’m in the process of adopting my cousin whom I have had since he was 3 and is now 7. Next week if all goes as planned I will be adopting him. I told his teacher that I could come in and bring a treat to celebrate his “name change” do you have any…
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Reader: With school getting ready to start, should I tell my child’s teacher that my child was adopted? Adoption Coach:Dear Reader: This is a question I’ve had myself a few years ago when one of my children started preschool, and I believe it’s a very common concern among adoptive parents. My friends who are fellow…
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Reader: I’m starting to get lots of questions from my son, just in our evening conversation. I want to answer everything right, not answer more than he asks, and make it feel natural—but it breaks my heart. Are there wrong or right answers, or things to stay away from? Adoption Coach: Dear Reader: Thank you…
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Reader: My husband and I adopted our 6 year old son from Ethiopia. He came home at 14 months. At age 3.5 he was diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) and Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD). He is bright, but not yet at the point of understanding that all babies grow in tummies, let alone that…
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Reader: I am looking for a good kids book to help my biological child age 9 understand the adoption of his younger sister. Any suggestions would be welcomed. Adoption Coach:Dear Reader: Congrats on adding to your family through adoption! You are wise to carefully consider your son’s feelings and adoption education. First, be prepared to…
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Reader: I have an issue I would like some advice if possible. We are foster parents and have been for almost 14 years. We adopted our daughter at age 7 she came to us at age 4. We were open to a semi-open adoption and were giving bio mom pictures and emails, but this woman…
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