Kevin and Wesley

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From Us to You

We cannot relate to what you, as an expectant mother, are experiencing and the thoughts going through your mind during this journey. What we can say is if we are fortunate enough to be chosen by you, your child will be loved, unconditionally. We will be open in our communications with you, and you can trust that our deepest thanks and appreciation to you for allowing us to build a family will be expressed to your child throughout their life. Your child will be in a home with comfort, stability, and great opportunity provided by two dads who will ensure a childhood of fun and happy memories. We would not be going through this process if we did not 100% believe in our ability to provide a child with a great life.

We know selecting the parents to raise your child is an immensely difficult decision. We can promise that choosing us is not a gamble or risk. We are responsible and kind, loving and laughing individuals. Your child will be part of a family and community where they will experience welcoming and generous individuals who will do whatever it takes to ensure they have a remarkable life.

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Why We're Choosing to Adopt

To give and grow. That is the simplest but most honest way to articulate why we are choosing to adopt a second child. We both dream of a life where we continue to grow our family, to whom we give love, comfort, and happiness. We did not want a life of simply going out to new restaurants alone or exploring cities by ourselves. We want to give our children experiences of adventure and fun together as a unit and live a life of meaning. Now, we know from the first year raising our son that family life is not all flowers and rainbows. It comes with the midnight wakeup calls (followed by 2 AM, 4 AM and 6 AM), diaper changes, and spit up on dress shirts, but as odd as it sounds, we are wanting those things again because it also means having another baby to hug, kiss, love, and for our son to be siblings with as a family.

We have been asked why adoption and why not surrogacy. Both of us are thoughtful individuals who like to reflect and fully understand a matter before we make a significant decision. We researched and spoke with individuals who have gone down both roads. Couples reach different decisions on the best path for them, but for us, adoption was absolutely the right fit. We are fortunate in our ability to give a child access to opportunities that they may not otherwise have without the process of adoption. There are so many children who need homes with caring parents and we are here in the hopes that we will be able to help. Wes, Parker and Maggie cuddling at home

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Our Lifestyle

We recently relocated to Kevin’s hometown to be closer to family because we want Parker and his sibling to be surrounded by loved ones throughout their lives.  We are fortunate to live in a neighborhood with other young kids so that plenty of playdates and outdoor fun can happen throughout the years.

Our lifestyle is strongly connected to the seasons.  In the late spring and summer, we enjoy being outside whether that’s grilling on our patio or taking walks around the neighborhood after dinner, before bed.  We also love taking Parker to his uncle and aunt’s pool to splash around with his cousins.  In the fall and winter, as the weather gets colder, we enjoy movie and game nights sitting around the fire.  There is something incredibly relaxing about being snuggled under blankets next to our dog, Maggie, in front of the fireplace.  Although movies have begun to shift to Disney or episodes of Ms. Rachel, we look forward to these nights where we can enjoy each other’s company.

Throughout the year, we love to travel.  We try to make it to the beach at least once a year and somewhere internationally once a year.  We both have great memories from our travels as kids, in college, and so far together.  We had the best time last spring taking our son to the beach for his first trip to the ocean and summer enjoyed time in the Arizona desert.  We are so excited to bring our kids along for these adventures, giving them time to relax and play in the sun, and offering them a world view through firsthand experiences.

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About Wes, by Kevin

Kevin values Wes’ dedication. Wes is a dedicated father to our son making sure that he gets in playtime every day. Kevin can see how happy being a father makes Wes through his smiles, taking of countless pictures 😊, and comments. Life can present unexpected challenges and knowing that Wes is always there as a steady, dedicated force is invaluable. Our kids will always know a father who is there for them and happy to take on any challenge with them whether that’s teaching them to play tennis (like Wes did growing up) or studying for that impossible math test. (Yes, Wes is a math geek and Kevin loves his intellect combined with his love of sport).

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About Kevin, by Wes

Wes likes when he comes downstairs on weekend mornings and Kevin is in his reading chair sipping coffee with a book if our son is still asleep. It is a comforting scene. Of course, Kevin has already set out our son’s breakfast for when he wakes, fed the dog, and made coffee for us both because he is an early riser. 😊 Kevin is definitely a book worm and purchased many, many children’s books that he reads to our son before bed. One thing that Wes loves about Kevin is that he cannot spend all day reading, he needs to be active. He still enjoys swimming laps, after having been on his college swim team, and talks about teaching our son to swim. He never sits still long and is always dreaming up his next big project.

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Our Home

Our home is located on a tree-lined street in a private neighborhood that provides peacefulness and security.  We love it here.  We enjoy our walks around the block under the huge sycamore trees and seeing the neighborhood kids ride their bikes around the sidewalk. Many of the homes have playsets and tree houses in the backyards buzzing with activity, which inspired us to install a playset with a slide and swings in our yard. We are excited that young families are nearby for playdates, BBQs and birthday parties.

We moved back to the Midwest to be close to family and were somewhat unsure of how we would be welcomed as a gay couple.  It has been a non-issue. The day we moved in multiple neighbors stopped by to introduce themselves and bring us food.  It is a neighborhood where people wave and ask, how was your day, when they see you because there is a deep sense of community.  We say it often and really feel like we won the lottery with our neighbors.

We both appreciate the sense of calm and pride when walking into our home.  We have, without shame, copied a lot of looks from Pottery Barn magazines and Potter Barn Kids for our son’s room.  Many late nights and weekends have been spent turning our house into a warm and inviting home for our son, family, and friends.  We look forward to family movie and popcorn nights on our comfy couch, story time in the nursery that we have filled with tons of stuffed animals, and morning eating pancakes in our breakfast nook.  We are excited to continue filling our home with sounds of toys, laughter, and giggles in the space we have created for our family.

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Our Family

Family is extremely important to us.  One reason we chose to move back to the Midwest was to be close to family.  We want our children to see their grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins frequently so that they can play together as we did growing up.  Everyone within our families have expressed nothing but support for our first and now second adoption journey and are overjoyed to welcome another child into our clan. They are actively involved in our son’s life and have already been planning birthdays, holidays, and family events for years to come 😊 With both of us having siblings, and nephews and a niece, it is a comfort to know that we can call upon our family members for tips and advice throughout this journey who have raised children of their own and will be there with absolute support.

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Racial and Cultural Diversity

Having lived in two of the country’s largest cities and both of us also spending time abroad in college has allowed us to personally experience diverse communities. In a country where people come from all backgrounds, we believe valuing each other’s differences is vital. We are thankful that our neighborhood has similar views. We never have to question if our children will be the only adopted children, the only children with gay dads, or the only biracial children because our neighborhood has families with children in each group. We know that at some point children start comparing their families to others and our children will always be able to relate to others. Although the physical homes and landscape may resemble a time past, the families of our community reflect the present and are supportive of our adoption. The excitement for building our family doesn’t stop with us, our neighbors cannot wait for more children on the street.

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Our Son Parker

Our son was born in June 2023 so just turned 1 not long ago! He was adopted at birth and we still keep in regular contact with his birth mom, who adores seeing pictures of him as he is growing up. The picture of him smashing his little cake at his birthday party and tasting icing for the first time is framed in our house. He loves riding in his play car that we push around the neighborhood and dancing to Disney songs by shaking his little body and raising his arms above his head. He is going to love having a sibling to be with for story time before bed, watching his favorite show Bluey, countless adventures, and outdoor fun. Although he is a bit young to be running around with the neighborhood kids in backyards at birthday parties or summer gatherings, you can tell he enjoys watching everyone and cannot wait to get in the mix of fun!

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Our Relationship with Parker's Birthmom

We will always have the utmost respect and thanks for our child’s birth mother. She allowed us to become a family when we otherwise wouldn’t have had the option. We text and send pictures with her monthly. We have told her that we are happy to communicate however often she wants and have honored her request.

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Our Promise to You

We are so extremely thankful to you for giving us this treasured opportunity to raise your child. We understand that selecting a family is an exceedingly difficult decision that invokes a number of emotions. We know you must be thinking what type of life your child will have with us and what type of parents we will be. Here is our promise to you:

We promise to nurture and love your child unconditionally for all our lives. Some families barely hug each other or say the phrase, “I love you,” to their siblings or parents. They maintain a certain distance as they grow through life. We are the exact opposite. We hug and kiss our son every single day. We believe in expressing emotion and connecting with each other as a family.

We promise to provide your child with a life of comfort and opportunity. We have worked to create a loving home in a welcoming neighborhood surrounded by caring and thoughtful people. Your child will be able to enjoy life with bicycle rides, tennis matches, and swim meets. They will have plenty of time to play with other kids and enjoy a fun childhood. We will also make sure they are given a top education at one of the many great schools located in our community. We know how education can help create opportunity and want our children to be able to choose whatever path makes them happy and live life to the fullest.

We promise to be there. We would not go through this adoption process if we were not 100% certain that we will make amazing parents and create a loving family. We know that means commitment. We are fully committed to the late-night bottle feedings, the carpools to and from activities, and the presence at events. Yes, we work but we have chosen jobs that provide us with the flexibility and predictability so that we can be presence in our child’s lives- see the first steps, hear the first word, and even see the cap thrown for the first graduation. We are even fortunate to have a support network of family and friends who will help us when help is needed. We are not so naive to think we can do it all alone. We have head the phrase, “it takes a village to raise a kid,” and we with the loving support of others, will make sure we are there and ready for our child throughout their life.