Will I Get to Visit with My Child After Placement with Adoptive Parents?

Often, when an expectant mother places a child for adoption, she wants to have the child in her life in some capacity—personal visits, phone calls, email, and photo sharing.

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One of the first questions an expectant mother planning to place her child for adoption may ask is if she will be allowed to visit her child after the adoption has been finalized. Open adoption has made visitation between a birth mother and child possible following adoption; however, there are factors that may affect how it is done. Because every state has its own laws it is best to check with an adoption professional about specifics.

Placing a child for adoption is one the toughest decisions an expectant mother will ever make in her life. It is not because she doesn’t care for her child; she loves her child and believes adoption is the best chance at a good life for her child. Many of these women would love to remain a part of their child’s life after placement through face-to-face contact, emailing, sharing photos, updates on milestones, etc. In healthy situations, it can be very beneficial to all members of the adoption triad when a birth mother has contact with her biological child. This also provides a way for an adoptee to have questions answered as they come up, over time. Having fewer “unknowns” helps an adoptee develop a stronger sense of identity and self-esteem.

Open adoption is quickly becoming the preferred choice of adoption placement for birth mothers today. It allows birth mothers to remain in their child’s life and this may reduce or eliminate feelings of regret and depression. In many open adoptions, an adoption attorney can prepare the document before placement of the child with selected adoptive parents takes place to ensure the terms of the open adoption agreement are set. According to Child Welfare Information Gateway, “a written contractual agreement between the parties to an adoption can clarify the type and frequency of the contact or communication and can provide a way for the agreement to be legally enforced. Approximately 28 States and the District of Columbia currently have statutes that allow written and enforceable agreements. Expectant mothers are highly encouraged to have a contract in order before terminating her parental rights.”

If an expectant mother chooses to have a closed adoption, it means that there is no exchange of information or updates between a birthmother and adoptive family until the child reaches legal age, and only as permitted by the law of the state(s) involved in the adoption. When the adopted child reaches legal age, in some, but not all states, records can be opened and contact can be made between a birth mother and her biological child.

If you are considering adoption for your baby and would like to learn more about hopeful adoptive parents who wish to create a family with an open adoption and will welcome post-placement contact, our Adoption Advisors are available to help you.

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